Has male-bashing crept into your church?
Nationally syndicated columnist Kathleen Parker released a book this summer that may prove an unlikely ally for those concerned about the lack of engaged men in American churches. In Save the Males: Why Men Matter, Why Women Should Care, Parker identifies our cultural moment as one in which it's acceptable to portray men as dumb, violent, sex-crazed, or irresponsible husbands and fathers. (Movies and TV shows like Everybody Loves Raymond, Two and a Half Men, and Knocked Up, to name but a few, typify this depiction.)
Parker, who frequently writes on families and sexuality, believes cultural "male-bashing" in part comes from the mainstreaming of a feminism that assumes men must be devalued so that women may rise to a place of equal treatment politically and professionally. What is refreshing about Parker's argument is that it's rooted not in shrill, anti-feminist rhetoric (she calls herself a feminist), but in Parker's personal history and current family situation: She was raised by a single father after her mother died, and now has three young boys. Her adolescence was marked by the realization that men are, well, human. Here's how she described it to Karen Spears Zacharias:
Each day after school, I joined [my father] at his law office where I did my homework until he finished up. Once home, we convened in the kitchen where he cooked while I perched on a wooden stool peeling potatoes. We talked.
In that ritualized communion, I learned many useful lessons about the opposite sex. I learned that men like to talk while doing something else. . . . I learned that fathers adore their children and will sacrifice anything to help them succeed. I learned that fathers will lay their lives down for their children. I learned that men are capable of honor, valor, compassion and courage and that they are essential to instilling those virtues in their sons and daughters.
Given Parker's thoroughly personalized vision of men and subsequent sensitivity to male-bashing, some of the antidotes to American churches' lack of men offered by David Murrow, author of Why Men Hate Going to Church and ChurchforMen.com, strike me as ironic. Could it be that Murrow's solutions -- shorter, to-the-point sermons, action-oriented worship songs like "Onward Christian Soldiers," ministries that feature cars or extreme sports -- play on the very caveman stereotypes that belittle men instead of help them utilize their gifts through full participation in church life?
Posted by Katelyn Beaty on August 15, 2008 8:55AM
Comments
Yep. That is exactly why I am reluctant to participate in most male-oriented Christian ministries.
Posted by: Adam S at August 15, 2008
The Enlightenment informed us that we were autonomous gods. In 1973, Roe vs. Wade confirmed the notion that women were ultimate Deity, having power of life or death. This caused a 'primal' shift in society's collective psyche and sent the culture 'over a cliff', figuratively speaking. The social damage has been horrendous...even within the evangelical church. As few, like Parker, and Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (LOVE & RESPECT) are seeking to reverse and mend the tragic wreckage.
Posted by: Dan S at August 18, 2008
I am not a member of any particular church, but the fact that male-bashing has entered the church is undeniable. The rise and mainstreaming of feminism in secular society is being mirrored in some demoninations. The Bible is being revised (NRSV, NLT, TNIV, etc.) to remove masculine terms - "he", "man", "mankind" - to make it more palatable to feminist sensitivities. It will result in the title "God the Father" becoming more and more denigrated among a growing number of Christians until it will no longer be polite or politically correct to associate God with masculinity at all.
Certainly, both males and females are created in the image of God equally bearing that image and equally valuable. But male and female were also created to fulfill specific gender roles. The attempt of some denominations to overrule those roles in an attempt to placate feminist theologies is a foundational mistake that is giving credence to the arguments of the homosexual movement to ignore - or rewrite - the Bible in order to achieve equality with heterosexuality in every area of life. This will simply lead to more revisionist biblical interpretations to accomodate whatever sin one wishes to to saved in rather than to be saved from.
This should not surprise us. Male-bashing has become so pervasive our children are exposed to it even by the cartoons they watch. "The Proud Family" and "The Fairly Oddparents" portray husbands and fathers as dimwitted and stupid while the females are smart, strong, decisive, and in control. So, who needs men? And who needs a God who calls Himself "Father"?
Posted by: Terry L. Brown at August 20, 2008
Save The Males night be a popular movement to save our churches and the collective direction in which our society is headed, however, it will take time to undo what has been done.
It is difficult to celebrate the blessed union of both male and female and their natural gifts for and to each other when society, as a whole, embraces the notion of individuality and the devaluation of both sexes.
I do not believe Roe v Wade or any other single decision is to blame for the predicament of our churches and spirituality as a whole. The problem is rooted in the simple fact that we, as Christians, forget our CREATOR and HIS message more times than we should in most decisions that we make ..... we forget GOD's roadmap, HIS words, HIS plan. Feminism and television shows are convenient targets, however, the problem is more firmly rooted in our societal and corporate style of behavioral modification, which do not appear to suit either of the sexes and/or their involvement with, or for, each other (or the church or the state).
Personally, I believe that GOD intended that we be nurturing and respectful believers, rather than warring factions from a splintered tribe. Perhaps a more positive message of unity, rather than the notion of gender-bias and/or it's conformity would suit the modern church better ......
Posted by: Hubie Quiva Schlitz at August 23, 2008
The truth is that "discrimination against women" has always been a hoax. Visualize an America where women work to support men, women give men everything in divorce court, women pay massive child support and alimony to automatic custody fathers, women alone fight and die for their country and where women go down with the ship so that men and children can climb on the life boats. Are men victims of sex discrimination? Should men be given all the jobs, too? Shouldn't women be paid more than men because women bear the responsibility of supporting the opposite sex and the related expenses that go with it? These questions answer themselves.
Feminism is a lie-and all that it takes to prove it is to reverse the roles of the genders.
Posted by: john thames at March 15, 2009
Post a comment