Sorry for my limited english, I´m brazilian.
About theuestion at Post´s end... I don´t think so. I guess the desire of relevance is tempting for both - men and women, because of this there is many problems in famalies (because of competetion, caused by desire of relevance).
Peace!

I don't think for women it's so much a desire for relevance. I think it's a desire to be heard and taken seriously, and I don't think striving for that equality is a temptation. Fortunately I'm a member of a denomination that has ordained women since its beginning in 1903 (the Church of the Nazarene), and I am an ordained minister. But even with that tradition there are times I have to stand up for myself and remind the congregations that I have served that my calling and training are just as valid as the male pastors I have worked with. I've also been very fortunate to be led by senior pastors who have validated my calling and did all they could to help me grow as a leader.

I don't think being "relevant" is the be all and end all of church service, but we do have to have a degree of relevance so that we can show people how Christ can make a difference in their lives. We have to show that the Kingdom is relevant to their everyday lives without going with every marketing trend the church growth gurus come out with. That can be a very fine line to walk, but it is a line we have to negotiate in each church and neighborhood, so that we can build the Kingdom. To determine if we are being good stewards or giving into temptation is matter of prayer and discernment.

Thank you Amy for an interesting and thought provoking blog. I went back into Matthew and read again those verses dealing with the temptation of Christ in the desert. You asked us what it means to respond as Jesus did. The context of that temptation was that Satan wanted Jesus to prove who he was by what he could do - "If you are the son of God...." is how that temptation was presented. The world challenges us to do the same. This is where we stumble as leaders. Thinking we can prove our worth to others in the church, the world at large, and even to ourselves by somehow measuring up to others' expectations of what our ministries and lives should look like. Jesus was right to respond that the only true measure is the word of God itself. In the long run, our "relevance" will not be judged by others - it will be judged by Jesus. It is best for us to judge our performance by His standard and not by anything else. The standard of Christ was absolute and total dependence on God. Christ himself said many times that He did only what the Father told Him to do and only what He saw His Father doing so He could bring glory to His Father - not to Himself. That and that alone is the goal of great leaders - to glorify God and further His kingdom on earth through the very gifts and abilities God himself has seen fit to give us. A sound theological understanding of where spiritual gifts come from and exactly how we were PURCHASED by Christ's sacrifice for service to God goes a long way in understanding this principle. When we remind ourselves exactly how we came to have our gifts, it becomes alot easier to be humble about executing them.

I believe the word of God goes against this concept of "relevance" for self because it robs God of the glory in our service and puts the spotlight on us. You made many good points about women not feeling worthy, not being affirmed, perhaps not being appreciated. I can relate and I can empathize with how discouraging that can be. However, I have to wonder sometimes if the Lord hasn't done us a service somehow in allowing it. We're not supposed to be seeking those things in the first place are we? Isn't it easier to set aside our pride when no one seems to be making a big deal about us in the first place? When will it be enough for us to serve God because we love HIM, instead of always seeking the affirmation of others?

I guess I've answered your question. Yes - I believe we need to be careful we don't make relevance an idol. The Israelites wanted to look like everyone else around them, so they sought a king to give them relevance in place of a God who had chosen them and loved them. Let's be careful we don't do the same ladies in our pursuit of the regard and respect of others.

I have read and contemplated over what I've read and I shout "Yes" we need to be careful we don't for get who is relevant. God and only through Jesus can we be used or make a difference. It doesn't matter about education or ease of words, position or what you've obtained but it does matter if this is God's journey for you. A Kingdom only respects the King's wishes, desires and judgements.

I think the whole temptation is to think so much of ourselves in general. Not that we don't care for who we are but that we learn contentment in the circumstance that we're in...trusting wholy in a God to direct us in his intimate way and to love others deeply from the heart. This keeps us from having to fight political games in our church. We say what we need to say in love when the time presents itself...but in order to love we must be free from selfconcern.
"Suggestions for Fasting and Feasting: Fast from self-concern; feast on compassion for others. Fast from unrelenting pressures; feast on unceasing prayers . Fast from bitterness; feast on forgiveness.

-Anonymous

Noewen also talks about the path of peace and intimacy with God...this guages our fear and concern...not fatalism just abundant trust.

Thank you for this blog post and the following responses. I've been doing a lot of praying and thinking about the current trends in desiring to "relevant" more than anything else. This perspective has helped me fit an extra piece to the jigsaw puzzle - relevance isn't everything, and CHristians don't have to try too hard to identify with the world, or "package" Christianity into a palatable thing. That would be taking things into our own hands.

It's Debbie again. I do find I struggle with using my gifts when it doesn't seem to be acknowledged as though it were useful. I have often hidden away my gifts as a result - if it's not needed, then why use it? However, I'm not sure how to deal with this. Through the parable of the talents, I learnt that we need to keep using them, even though no master is physically there to look at my work. So I just try and develop them regardless... it's so hard though!

Today march 8 is International Women's Day. I believe Women got a new experience everyday.We are becoming irrelevant if we stop grounding ourselves from the reality. We need to be connected with each other regardless of lifes status we will experience God's unending grace and renewing of skills, talents and abilities if we are connected with each other. I wish we women should hold each other to empower one another. The reality will strenghten us to be relevant.

We are only tempted if we are not grounded to the reality. I wish we will work together to help those who are tempted.

It's happened to me again and again that I've been put in situations where I've been tempted to prove myself. Heartbreaking experience has taught me that when I see the first sign of someone trying to compete with me in a church situation, it's best to back off, resign, walk away or whatever it takes and look to the Lord.

Oh my what a good question. I have been reading some of the comments made by other women. I suppose that there are as many opinions on relevance as there is women. What I see in this more than anything is that just like Jesus, Satan is our enemy too. It is our enemy that requires of us to prove our relevance. When I am faced with this, all I do is remind him(satan) of the Blood Line that I am under and he is not allowed to cross.

I also read Henri's book when I attended Seminary nine years ago. I reflected then and now, on the word, "relevant". Webster's dictionary defines it as "bearing upon or relating to the matter at hand; to lift up", etc. It is a temptation for both men and women in ministry to want credit for what you do. Having worked in pastoral ministry for a number of years with both males and females, I think there may be a slightly greater tendency for women to be people-pleasers, or to try and "prove" our worthiness by taking on too much. (That said, taking on too much is quite easy to do by anyone in ministry).

For me, it helps to know who you are and whose you are. When I think about Jesus and what He's done for me, I am humbled and honored at the same time. It is good to "examine ourselves" and to ask God to "search our hearts" now and then. For what's in the heart will surely come out. My desire is to have a heart that is centered on God and Jesus Christ, and to do His will, in spite of my faults. Temptations will come, but we don't have to give in to them, if we are rooted and grounded in Christ and in His Word. It also helps to have others to be accountable to, and not be isolated.
Fellowship with other believers and other women in ministry is extremely important.

Thanks for the great comments! This issue represents an ongoing struggle for me. I have to pray every day for God to help me be all about him and his glory that day. Otherwise (and sometimes still), I become full of my own ambitions and desire to be relevant. But I have found that if I work primarily for my own relevance, I never feel satisfied because it's all based on my own efforts and they never seem to be good enough.

I agree with Shawna that we have a "desire to be heard and taken seriously".

It is sometimes other women and church hierarchies who block us. Instead of bringing, including, working together, and advancing the kingdom we exclude or second-guess each other, causing us to second-guess ourselves.

I've job transferred and had to have my ministry gifts, skills and abilities lie dormant while I waited out 'probation periods'(some mandatory) of being a newcomer although I'd been in church ministry for over 20 years. My husband and I were even told we needed to go through Christianity 101 again by two churches just because it was the "process".

Colossians 2:6-7The Message, says, My counsel for you is simple and straightforward: Just go ahead with what you've been given. You received Christ Jesus, the Master; now live him. You're deeply rooted in him. You're well constructed upon him. You know your way around the faith. Now do what you've been taught.

I like the idea of doing what we've been taught to do without always worrying what others are going to say or think.

What I have found very interesting, is that in ministry, church setting you name it. Yes, it could be a desire to be seen as relevant, but what about if you have poured yourself and sacrificed through very painful moments and others still don't see your work, giftings or sacrifice because you have to run change a diaper, make a meal, or have to keep the kids quiet at a conference? I find that people tend to overlook the Mom who does much in ministry as well, and is the undergirder of her husband. Relevance? Maybe. For me - the occassional thank you, or the lack of stepping up to the plate of others is what drives me crazy.
Why sacrifice and bless ingrates? Then, I remember Jesus, and I make sure that I am doing His will, His command, and I know that He is please, but man, it can be hard. Respect and honor - basic level- and thank you is also correct. Takng others for granted boils down to using them and manipulating for selfish needs. It's a flesh/spirit battle. It means obeying and taking up my Cross and following Jesus daily, not looking at who sees me carrying it! Ahhhhhh! Painful! Benefits: Eternal.

I think the tempation for relevancy is very real. However, as mature Christian women,we need to keep everything in perspective and on open palms. So, the not good enough, not attractive enough, not strong enough depicts a not confident in Christ person. When one is not confident in Christ, obviously one gifts lie dormant. When we try to prove ourselves and try to become relevant, it speaks of the same lack in confidence in Christ. We need to strike a balance - our relevancy must be related to our relationship with Christ, whether we are in the wilderness or in success, our focus remains Christ. Temptaion is not a sin, giving in to temptation will be.

I thank you for a thought provoking article that illuminates an issue I believe all believers in God and Christians struggle with, am I going to be the solution to my problem or whatever issue is before me? Am I willing to wait on God to be told when to use the gifts God has placed inside of me. I believe women grapple with this more than men because we tend to be the primary care givers of children. I said primary not only, and we are faced with issues that need right now solutions on the surface. Because God has gifted us in unique ways, one of them is the ability to be great multi-taskers. Like the Wizard of Oz we have a great up-front show and the insecurities, and hard work that go in to making it happen does not get recognized.

What it means to respond as Jesus did is to wait on God to be the supplier of all of our needs regardless of how it looks. Sarai and Abram decided God was moving too slowyly in supplying an heir for Abram. After living through the consequences of not waiting on God, Abraham was willing to trust God even when it meant sacrifricing his son of promise.

I really do not believe I need to prove myself to anyone. I belive I have been set free from people's opinions. I believe that there is freedom in the Word of God, if one is seeking it and understanding what the Holy Spirit reveals to us. I am strong enough, because I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, I am certainly exciting and attractive because I am nade in the image of all mighty God. That alone is exciting!!
It does not matter how many people praise me , or tell me how attractive or anointed I am, if I DO NOT BELIEVE and KNOW WHOSE I AM I will always be looking for approval and affirmation in the eyes of people. God set me free from people's opinion of me. I want to be a God pleaser and not a people please today. Praise God from whom all blessings flow!!!

I believe that part of what makes a gift a gift is that we bring relevance to others' lives through it, and we ourselves experience relevance as a result.

I liken this to the act of eating amongst friends. If eating weren't relevant, even pleasurable on some level, would I do it? Would I invite my friends over for the experience?

Perhaps I might for survival's sake (and, certainly, this is exactly how it goes sometimes). But there's little richness in that.

Which is to say...why should we be afraid to experience rich pleasure in exercising our gifts? Does this denial of pleasure not eclipse some important part of our humanity? Just some curiosity questions, even as I enjoy your discussion of the matter.

Hello all These comments are all thought provoking. I too am in a situation where after serving twenty years as the Drama ministry director. One of my areas of responsibility was the annual Christmas and Easter programs for the Sunday School. Now in an astounding display of church politics I have been "kicked to the curb" so that the PASTOR'S DAUGHTER can have that ministry. I should let you know that through the years I did hold it with an "open palm" as suggested in one of the comments. By that I meant that anyone who had ideas or wanted to try their hand at the programs was given the opportunity to do so. Once again I have been hurt by the total disregard for my years of faithful service and the shameless use of worldly tactics by the people of God. Why does exercising your gift stir people to envy and jealousy? I have been counseled to just step aside and be still. But this leaves a very bitter taste in my mouth.

I want to thank Kelly who posted on March 6 for her answer. I copied it and put it in my Bible. I work in Christian Education and when I am tempted to be relevant, I will pull this out and read it. I am not very concerned about meeting others expectations, but I can never seem to meet my own. It brings me great peace to be reminded that I need only do what I see our Father doing and the task will not only be good enough but also have the upmost relevancy.

For Carmina, I come against that bitter root you say is growing in you in the name of Jesus. God never kicks his faithful to the curb. It sounds as if you have served him faithfully in that ministry for many years and it may be that he wants to use you to mentor the Pastor's daughter. It may also mean that he wants to use your gifts for a different purpose. Whatever it is, you can be sure that God has not forgotten your faithful service and any change is designed to first glorify Him and secondly to benefit you. Jer. 29:11 says "For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, `plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope." "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28 May God bless you and give you peace.

Relevance...what a provocative topic. I'm not convinced that it's gender specific. It seems to me that this is a struggle for humankind, regardless of sex. Our flesh desires relevance. We lust after it, so often claiming our identities through our relevance. Rather, Paul makes presenting ourselves as living sacrifices an issue of relevance as children of God. Hard as I might try, I can't seem to find the integration between relevance and sacrifice. Unless, of course, our relevance is in our sacrifice. (No double talk intended.)

I was scientist. I did not try to prove myselfe by making myself to be a scientitst. I cannot imagine that people who are high positions of any fileds want to prove who they are to be there. Unfotunatly that in the Christianity field, women are put into second class by tradition, or by the authorities who claim they do it according to Bible, " in the name of God". If women raise their voice, and try to be leaders, because of temptation, or because of that they have the sense of justice and abilities that God put into their hearts when God create them?

This book by Henri Nouwen, In the Name of Jesus, is my favorite book. I read it every year. To understand what Amy wrote about the temptation of relevance, you have to read the book. Otherwise, we will quibble about the definition of "relevant" and argue about whether we should or shouldn't be relevant. Please read the book.

Thank you for this blog. I completely understand what you mean about seeking relevance. We are all human beings and even from the beginning, as babies, we all seek relevance. It is natural to want and need that. It is a natural need of the flesh. However, as one walks with the Spirit, our needs get shifted to spiritual needs, aligned to God's will not our will. I believe that Satan was testing Jesus to see if He will do God's will. "...Not my will but Thy will be done" (The Lord's Prayer"

I think that women's desire for relevance all started back in the Garden of Eden. Think about how much Eve wanted to be thought important as she was tempted by Satan to eat of the forbidden fruit because of her desire to know more. Because she was deceived and then caused Adam so sin, she was told in Gen 3:16 that from then on her husband would rule over her.

Women want to be recognized as intelligent and worthy. I think we deeply long for it. Unfortunately that desire, coupled with our more emotional nature increases our sensitivity to deception.

So, in answer to your question, yes, I believe that women want to be relevant. We must be ever so careful though to keep our emotions in check because of that desire. That's why it is perhaps even more important for women in leadership to keep in the Word of God.