Living Fearlessly
November 28, 2008 |
Two days ago, my daughter and I stood in line at IKEA. Halfway through loading our “small stuff” onto the conveyor belt and repositioning the “big stuff” (I’d tell you what it all was but it would ruin some Christmas surprises!) in the cart, the woman at the register held up her hand, stop-style.
The credit card for the people ahead of us wasn’t going through, and she needed to call a manager. Those of us in the rather long line followed her head around the front of the store as she looked for the manager. Then we noticed all the other people in other lines (and if you’ve been to IKEA, you know there are a lot of lines!) were doing the same thing. Then someone yelled (or said pretty loudly) out, “It might be a problem with the banks. The cards aren’t going through….”
And in that moment, I thought, Well, here we are: in IKEA (munching on a bag of Swedish fish I haven’t yet paid for), the moment the entire banking system finally collapsed.
In the first few minutes of waiting and wondering, my mind wandered to some weird places: I looked sadly at my daughter and thought about what her life would be like now that we were officially entering another Great Depression. I thought of my many family members employed by banks and wondered what they would do. I hoped Christianity Today International (the company behind Gifted For Leadership) had processed my latest paycheck—and hoped it would still be good. But where would I deposit it if the banks are gone….
On and on it went, and with every “what if” that zipped through my brain, I began to get more nervous. By the time my Blackberry buzzed in my purse—alerting me to an incoming email—I was convinced the world outside that IKEA, the one in which I had always known, had totally fallen away. And I was a bit scared.
Fully expecting the email to be one of my Chicago Tribune e-mail news alerts (which keeps me up to snuff on world and local events as I blitz around through my day) indeed informing me of the Total World Financial Collapse, I was surprised to see instead a email thread from my sisters-in-law about our Secret Santa exchange. No email alerts at all. Suddenly I felt much calmer. Then a few moments later a store manager came over to turn a key on the register, plunk in a new code, and apologize for the delay.
“Our system blipped,” she said. “Sorry, folks!”
So the banks were fine after all. Just a little blip. Phew. But then something bigger hit me, much more troublesome. For one, I was ashamed how quickly I allowed myself to get freaked out over my own over-active imagination (though in this economic climate, it wasn’t that far-fetched to imagine!). For two—and this was the biggie—I realized that never in my worry had I prayed or sought God’s counsel or comfort. I ultimately found relief in my Blackberry.
This wasn’t the first time this sort of thing had happened. While I’m not necessarily a worrywart, I do have a tendency to let stress take hold, to let my mind go to the most extreme scenarios, and then, worst of all, to forget that indeed God is Lord of all. And that that same God—who is Lord of all—has told me not to be afraid, not to worry, and to take heart—because he has overcome this world of troubles.
And yet, how quickly I forget when things get scary, worrisome, and troubling. How quickly I turn to things like email alerts—and what other people are telling are telling me about situations—while forgetting to seek the Voice that really matters.
Even in times such as these, which seem awfully scary, I want to live fearlessly. But I need help. Any tips?
Caryn Rivadeneira, managing editor of Gifted for Leadership, is author of Mama’s Got a Fake I.D.: How to Reveal the Real You Behind All That Mom. She and her family live in the western suburbs of Chicago. Visit her at her blog.
Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on November 28, 2008
Comments
No tips. (They'd sound like pat cliches, anyway.)
Lots of empathy. I have been paying attention to the places my mind goes in those "ikea moments", and my adrenaline-juiced thoughts run everywhere but Jesus until I lasso them and take them captive. (But they run fast, and I'm a terrible lasso-er.)
May God give us both the grace to grow in our roping skills.
Posted by: Michelle Van Loon on November 30, 2008
but you have already given yourself the answer: to forget that indeed God is Lord of all. And that that same God—who is Lord of all—has told me not to be afraid, not to worry, and to take heart—because he has overcome this world of troubles. - ye, hard they may be (i know well the feeling) ciao gby
Posted by: giorgio on December 4, 2008
well. in spite of the danger of this being a "pat cliche." here is one: start every day, knowing that one or more temptations to worry are going to ambush us. then prepare by looking up and memorizing, or writing down and taking with, a verse or two that counteracts fear. i should use this on my "bugaboo", talking without praying!
joining with michelle in praying for His grace in these and all areas of our lives... thank YOu Lord!
Posted by: bonnie on December 4, 2008
Hi Caryn,
I don't know you, but it does sound like like the panic and worry has managed to speak to you more loudly than God's word.
If you insist on giving the writers at the Chicago Tribune 24/7 access to your thoughts, is it also possible to subscribe to a similar service that send you bible verses?
If we are continually reminded to not to worry - or about the lillies of the field, or about storing up treasures where moth and rust do not destroy - then perhaps we would panic a little less.
Posted by: David on December 4, 2008
hi Caryn, just a word of encouragement, are we who belong to the Lord subject to the highs and lows of the economy... or are we controlled by God's economy. i believe the day I moved into the family of Jesus Christ, i definitely stand blessed now and forever, which means all of Deut 28 blessings. they will always apply to me what ever the circumstance around me. my encouragement to you and all those who are reading this is just this... declare into your life and the lives of your loved ones, and into your circle of influence nothing but blessing will be your portion all the days of your life. God Bless you.
Posted by: Rosy william on December 4, 2008
Everywhere I turn, people seem afraid...I've been finding real substantive help in this book titled, Running Scared: Fear, Worry, and the God of Rest by Edward Welch...New Growth Press....timeless and so timely.
Posted by: Michele on December 5, 2008
I'm thinking about engraving the following verses on my forehead:
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in EVERYTHING, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."
Then comes something that is even harder, but no less essential, to avoiding what you have described: "Finally, [sisters], whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is true, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." (Philippians 4:6-8).
And I now refuse to watch, or listen to, anything more than the minimum of the "bad" news that keeps us constantly on edge. Call it burying my head in the sand, but most of the doomsday saying of the sensationalist press doesn't fit in Paul's description of thinking about the good stuff.
We are what we think and what we think is what we believe.
Posted by: Lynda Schultz on December 5, 2008
I can totally relate to your post. Having struggled with worry most of my life I know that all the " right scriptures" and ideas rarely work when fear comes in. It is so easy to say just do this or do that and don't let worry take hold..yet we live in very insecure and scary times.
The only thing I have learned that has truly helped me is to turn my eyes to the Lord whenever the fear or anxiety appears. I have discovered that my mind cannot worry and pray at the same time. God also reminds me of his faithfulness over the years and I am strengthened by Him.
Lots of us have " catastrophic expectations" and we may tend to condemn ourselves for them..but God does not. He wants to provide relief and a sense of security in this very insecure and uncertain world.
Thanks for your honesty and your willingness to share a very common struggle that many women grapple with every day.
Blessings to you as you TRUST HIM.
Posted by: Alicia on December 5, 2008
Psalms 37.
Posted by: Nancy on December 5, 2008
Thank you to Caryn and all of you who admitted your struggles and advice (Lynda - those two scriptures are two that I am memorizing), especially you who were honest (e.g. 'pat cliches'). God's richest blessings on you and you're in my prayers.
Posted by: Winnie on December 8, 2008
You need a cue, something that can snap you back when you are worried. There's that bouncy old, but profound, chorus, "Why Worry When You Can Pray?" http://www.calvarypandan.org/rhc/rhc.htm Try singing that to yourself in the checkout line next time.
Posted by: Lisa Deeley Smith on December 12, 2008
I think what helps me is to remind myself there is another dimension that exists outside of what is going on around me. It's so easy to get sucked into my own little world and forget that this world wasn't created for me. God has a plan that is unfolding and He allows events to fit into what He is doing. So instead of reacting to an event or an incident, I force myself to ask the bigger question, "What is God doing in the world? Why does this event fit His perfect timing? How am I to respond as one who represents His purpose?"
Posted by: Anita Carman on March 3, 2009