On this subject, Sarah Cunningham has written a book called Dear Church: Letters from a Disillusioned Generation Zondervan, Aug 2006. She is being interviewed today on Chris Monroe's Paradoxology Desert Pastor blog here.

Interesting. Some years back, a major denomination studied their young people, looking at those who had been "born under the altar." That is, from their childhood they had been in the church's youth programs, in attendance virtually every time the church doors opened. The question was, how many, once they were independent of their parents' choosing for them, remained in churches of that denomination? The answer? About 95% simply vanished. Gone.

At the same time, a major missionary organization did a similar study, wating to know how many of their kids, raised in missionary homes and immersed in the lifestyle and work, came back into the mission as adults. Their return was not automatic, and they had to undergo training and education, and raise their own support. The answer? About 95% came back to the mission as adults.

What are these guys doing differently?

I taught a few years ago at a Christian university. There was a major push for students to attend local churches. Some local churches even came on campus, recruiting. Yet only a small number of our students attended church. Nobody at the university could understand. And yet, two carloads of our kids drive over spring break to Florida, half way across the country, not for the beaches but to visit a church and see what was happening there. When I pointed that out to a committee appointed to study the problem, the response was silence.

I grew up in a fairly conservative tradition that didn't do a good job of teaching me how to be a Christian. I learned lots of great Bible stories about people "back then," but got the distinct impression that Christianity existed to celebrate a God who used to be active but wasn't any more.

I loved hearing about God's plan for Gideon, but wished God had a plan for my life. Jacob's ladder was exciting, but left me wishing God would show up in my life. Noah's ark was a great story, but when was God going to destroy the evil people around me?

The church has to do a better job of accurately pointing to a God who is alive and active today if it hopes to touch the next generation with relevant Truth.

I have had my own set of questions and faith struggles. Even in preparing to pastor I really wonder about things sometimes.

Maybe I'll point out some of those questions later, but for now I simply want to underline the importance of this kind of discussion. I've worked at a restaurant for the past five years with a lot of other twentysomethings. A lot of them (my friends) have been disenchanted with the church as long as they can remember. Some atheists. One a self-described animist. One thing I've found is that we all enjoy simply discussing faith and religion. I listen and they listen back. I listen more. I do not automatically reject their thoughts for not being biblical. I do not shoot back "book" answers. I listen and show them that their opinions and thoughts are valuable. That they are valuable. And when I am able I explain whatever the best I can. Or I simply admit that I wrestle with the same things. My friends really seem to respond well to this and keep coming back for more discussion.

Another "pastor" started working at the restaurant about a month ago. He is a youth pastor between churches. He says he is an Evangelist, and asks tells every person he meets that they must come to Christ or they will go to hell. In our discussions, he's the kind of guy who has the answers for everything. Six points for how he can "prove" the Bible is God's Word. And six more points for how he can "prove" that the resurrection actually happened. "Point one is that we don't have Jesus' body." He actually words it like that and everyone responds, "We don't have anyone's body from that century." When this guy is not at work, everyone talks about how he's only interested in preaching his propaganda. About how he isn't interested in them. About how he doesn't listen. About how none of his answers seem genuine and they all seem memorized from a pamplet.

My (possibly bloated) point is that we must dialogue. We must engage. Not simply to push our message down throats. But to understand where they come from, let them know we value and appreciate them, and share the truth of scripture in a humble way. By telling them their concerns are not valid or giving them an answer that makes no sense, we really are telling them they're too stupid to think for themselves (which is oftentimes they're opinion of Christians anyway).

Good piece...had some great points that need to be thought about. But I wanted to add something. What if it is simply because we are not teaching the whole counsel of God (1 Tim.4:6-11; Mt. 28:19ff) to all our people at the same time?

What I mean is that if we are truly teaching the the whole word of God and it truth that speaks to all people, young, old, male, female, etc. than we are reaching them. By segregating our churches into the different age, singles vs. married, senior vs. middle age and only teaching certain topics than we are not preparing the younger ones to deal with life. For example, if we all met together as a body of Christ and talked about Proverbs and the wisdom of old age, we would be showing the younger ones that wisdom is not to be had right away but is a process over time, while at the same time teaching the older ones that wisdom is to be passed on to the younger ones.

I believe that we as body of Christ have become so segregated in our churches that we have a huge gap between the age groups. I think if we start having the younger ones (teens and youg adult) being taught by seniors (not fellow 20 year old's) that we may see more of them staying.

Just a thought. Not a fix-all but something that came to my mind and thought I would share. ANy thoughts anyone?

Blessings,

Shockingly enough, the two things I never got told were:

1. How does one obtain salvation? (Yes!)
2. Why is the Christian answer to 1 more plausible than the Muslim or Hindu answer or whatever.

WHY?

I think that is the biggest question (at least for me) it was almost taboo to question the faith and even more taboo to pick apart doctrine.

Funny thing is you know what the first class in Med school is, yeah anatomy, dissecting the body to find out why/how it works and functions.

Embrace the WHY

I'm 22 and I attended the church I do becuase the pastor there knows me by name and takes time to actually care. And because people in the congregation talk to me and actually remember what I said and if I go by myself someone will ask me to sit with them. It's definitely not the most entertaining of churches nor does it even have programs specifically for people my age, but the people there actually care about me and that what matters.

"These families share something in common: their young adult kids are not easily finding their places in the church of their parents." Perhaps the real question is this: How many were ever truly "in the church" of their parents? They were in the youth room with a youth leader and peers, but were they ever really in "big church" with mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, elderly, and baby? I often wonder if we are reaping the results of "silo" models of ministry whereby parents still see their most important contribution as "dropping off and picking up?"

"Are 20-somethings simply disinterested in church? Not according to Brian McLaren. He believes we are failing to listen to the questions young adults are asking. "

One question I am asking of the church is, "Can I be real with you?" For example, if I feel that church marketing sucks, must I say "church marketing stinks" instead? This site has modeled this by re-identifying the link to the site "Church Marketing Sucks" as a link to "Church Marketing Stinks." Decisions like this make me feel like my parents' church and even postmodern-/emergent-wannabe sites like this one are more concerned about marketing to the whole then they are about encouraging real discussion of spiritual things. Can we be real here? Or is this an edited-thought only conversation?

I wonder if the questions are not different because of perspective. I know that questions I have differ from my sons questions because I have a longer vantage point. I have fought the battkles that lay ahead them. I am not discounting their questions but I know that in few years they will not have same burning importance that other ones will.

And why is it always about the young people? One of the hard lessons that we all have to learn is that we are not the center of the universe. Children determine where families go to church. We program for them, we alter worship for them, and raise funds for them and we send them on experiences such as retreats and missions trips. When do we expect them to serve and contribute and give a little? Perhaps I am more sensitive to this because in our community we worship our children and young people.

I'm seeing this too.
However, what I'm seeing is many young women being seriously active in the church, and a disproportionate amount of young men conspicuously absent in the church.
Oh sure, they're around, but it seems when they hit near the senior year of high school...they make an "appearance," stand around and jaw-jack with each other inbetween services, but as soon as everyone goes into service, or to bible-studies...poof!
The young men are gone.
I asked my eldest where they go, and his response was a guarded, "ah, why?"
I just wanted to know, and he said "Taco bell."
I think we're a pretty tolerant church with a high population of engineers, programmers, scientists, lawyers, ceo's, service industry people, and regular schlobs like me (considering that the Pastor still finds evolution and anything scientific to be Satanic voodoo).

I'm not so sure it's asking the young people the right questions and getting to understand them...It seems to me the young men in our church just don't give a rip about G-d, or the bible.

I suspect children matter because churches are one generation from death...although hopefully they matter for more important reasons that this...

Even great churches who focus on the purposes of God and people over and above programs and places struggle with attracting and involving young adults. It would be interesting to have an extended dialogue regarding creative ways to include and encourage all ages in worship, mission, etc.

The thunder in the distance is compelling us to ask more beautiful questions in the Church and culture. What a privilege it is to see questions be the answer to the Church/culture interface rather than answers.

To question is to quest, at its best, and it is the perfect paradigm for the journey every human being finds themselves on. Well done on this book, and McLaren's call to question – toward the agenda of touching the most beautiful Question of all.

Wow,what a topic! Brian better be careful that he doesn't come off as 'seeker sensitive'.

I grew up 'under the altar' at my church. We were there whenever the doors were opened. I stayed because the way my parents behaved at home was no different than the way they behaved at church. They were totally authentic. The other kids who stayed came from authentic homes also. There were a lot of kids from phony homes too. Most of them left.

My Sunday School teacher was someone the kids knew they could talk to about anything, and we did. I remember many great spiritual debates when I was in high school. There were a lot of intellectual kids who were way beyond me. It was fun.

My own twenty-something daughter and her husband are so faithful to the Lord. She had praying parents and grand parents. She asked questions and got answers. Maybe the big problem today is that pastor's themselves have been so afraid to tackle the truth that parents don't even know what it is. Maybe pastor's don't even know what it is.

"Teens and young adults have acute B.S. detectors. And they actively avoid places where theirs goes off."
-anonymous youth pastor

I know a lot of teens that love God, cherish fellowship, and value scripture. But they do not know what to do about these three things. None of the options their churches present are satisfying. So they depart, attempting to find better ways to express these deep-felt values. Some are successful; others find nothing and give up.

As a 25 year old seminarian, here are my questions:

Why was the BODILY resurrection of Christ mentioned only on Easter???

Why was repentance to avoid hell when for Jesus it was to indwell the reign of God?

Why did you think making Jesus "cool" would help us have a vibrant faith? Perhaps my parents didnt really believe their faith had anything to do with the real world?

Why do you empahsized saving souls? Jesus did nothing of the sort, he emphasized discipleship as a salvation process aimed at the WHOLE PERSON...

What made you think big buildings and large capital campaigns constitute successful church?

Why did you confuse the American Dream as God's Dream?

Why did'nt we ever talk about the continent of Africa and the people who are burning alive with no clean water, food or sheter?

Why did you think America was a Christian nation or even should be?

Those are just a few:)

An add on to several posters who scored bull’s-eyes like Melody, Michael, Kent and Truth Seeker…

Humanly speaking, it starts with the parents. (But really with the Holy Spirit)

We have been making time for the study of God’s Word as a family at home since our kids were old enough to talk. They were saved at 8 and 9 and now they are 15 and 16. We go through the Bible a chapter at a time, verse by verse. We’re not afraid to declare the truth and we’re not afraid to say, “I don’t know the answer to that. Let’s dig in to the Word and find out.”

We also model the attitudes and behaviors we hope our children will exhibit. And we don’t pretend to be perfect. The thing we model for them probably more than anything is acknowledgement of our imperfection (and you can’t hide that from your kids), our brokenness over it and repentance.

Our kids, in spite of our inevitable failings, are on fire for Jesus. Praise God.

The church left me. I didn't leave it.

Woody Allen is known for making a popular comment familiar - though he did not originate the line... the statement is this: "I would not want to belong to a club that would have someone like me as a member." It's one of those ultra-funny / ultra-sad comments... because it gets to the heart of what I believe is the key problem with the church...

People.

As long as we have humans in the church, we will always have problems. But the church's issue is that in most cases we have forgotten this underlying truth - that human beings who are in process actually attend our churches! We assume that all is peachy-keen and that all we offer is perfect for those who attend! Or that if we can offer the latest and greatest "worship pizazz" then ALL will flock to our churches...

What we have forgotten is that our gatherings are ONLY about GOD - totally offering to Him all He is worthy of receiving - none of "church" is about us. And until we honestly figure that out - and agree with that - we will forever be asking the question, "why can't we REACH those OTHER people..."

For the last 30 years, churches have generally done their best to provide specialized ministries that segregated children and youth from the rest of the church. They may have a sizzling youth ministry, but it was essentially an alternate universe to the "adult" ministries. Is it any wonder that when kids graduate from a killer youth ministry without any real integration with other generations, that they aren't "finding their way" into the church?

Of course not. They've been directed away from the "grown-up" church for their entire lives!

The question: How can our community develop meaningful relationships between children, youth, and adults? Can we integrate the ages in an authentic way?

Here's a variation on a theme that has bubbled through some of these comments:

There's a disconnect between the church in Acts and the religious programming (silly, surfacey, performance-oriented) in most evangelical churches. How did Acts become whatever this stuff is we do in our churches now?

And which one (Acts or Programs) are we asking young adults to sign up for?

In my case, I stayed in the church for the simple reason that in my teenage years I had an experience that connected me to Jesus Christ and I became his follower and so I have always been involved, to some extent, in a local church. But it never was about the church for me. It was always about Jesus, and it was always pretty much a 7 day a week thing for me.

Most of my friends who didn't have a life-defining experience with Jesus didn't stay in the church. They had no reason to.

I think it's odd when we ask "How can we attract/keep young people?" -- like we're the Shriners in the middle of a membership drive. There's no way to keep young people without the component of a life-changing connection with Jesus. I don't think the church can do anything to make the non-committed prefer being there to being at Taco Bell.

The bottom line is that without Christ, the church doesn't have much to offer. We can get better music at a bar, hear better speakers at a comedy club, see betters dramas ...well, basically anywhere, have better "fellowship" at a country club -- the one thing none of these things can offer is a connection to the eternal. So if we really go out of our way to help people connect with Jesus, we'll keep them in church.

If we don't connect them to Jesus, we shouldn't expect that they would stay in church, regardless of what questions we do or don't answer.

I think that relationships between generations is largely missing from churches, as mentioned by previous posters. The church needs to impress upon the older generation that they are to support and disciple the younger generation - not just their kids, but other members of the church family. Kids may quit going to church with their parents to assert their independence from the family, but if other members of the church can support that young person through mentoring and real relationships it will become an authentic community - not your parents church.

I'm 23, preaching in a small town. Most of what I see week after week is that the 20-somethings have a real disdain for baby-boomers. But if the church is all baby-boomers, why would the 20-somethings be seen with people they largely despise?

The 20-somethings are all searching, but they HATE to be told what to do. In my community, most of the churches are classicly boring and pointless to them. Therefore, why should they try our church?...if it's just going to be boring and pointless. (Even though it's not.)

Changing the church's reputation into my generation is really freakin tough. And the resistance from the older generations just makes it tougher.

The problem that I see in my home church is that we have a strong youth and children's program, but nothing for young adults. There is a huge difference between 20 somethings and 40 somethings, and many people (older) in my church don't understand. I am young adult coordinator and when I say young adult I mean 20-30 not 18 and not 40. We want to have a place where we are welcomed, and we need the church body to approve our ideas, even if they are different than "what we've always done."

Overall, the young adults need to feel like they are welcomed in, and not just given jobs to do. Many women in my church cook as their ministry, I DON'T COOK! And I don't care too, I think I have other good qualities that I can use to the ministry, and I do. But I can see where lots of young adults pull away because they don't see there is a ministry there for them or a mission to complete.

I have been working in my community to bring in more people my age, but we also need people to help us. Most young adults have children, and we NEED to have babysitting and nursery services for ALL programs. Cooking is nice, but there must be more that can be done to help young adults feel welcome!

As for the questions, going to college and getting to question my faith is what has made a stronger Christian, parents should encourage such questions, it is with questioning that we find the answers, we will find the truth, but we have to be encouraged to look for it.

Here's a question from a 50 year old: why doesn't our 30-something year old pastor want to listen to or answer my questions? Answer: because he believes I'm safely attached to the church and am not likely to leave, even if ignored. Maybe we need to get back to paying attention to relationships (beginning with our individual relationship with the God we claim to worship, and then our relationships with the rest of the body of Christ) and stop investing all of our time and money into the afore-mentioned killer programs.

The answer given in Psalm 1 is that everything we want for our kids is available by "delighting" in the law of the Lord...day and night. What kinds of behaviors from a child or teenager would indicate that he is "delighting", finding nurture in, enjoying, stimulated by, responding to, hoping because of...the Word of God? Why would he not continue those behaviors into adulthood if they met his need during childhood? And where would he find peers with the same interests? Probably at church where we find them. Why would he go elsewhere with those appetites? Maybe because, like the lightning bug that got caught in the lawnmower, he was de-lighted, no end!

I just want to add to these comments by building on the last one posted about discipling the younger generation. I see it all the time in church. Older and younger generations who don't understand that it's about the legacy they leave behind. Many people in our churches don't comprehend that it's important; the training and equipping the saints for ministry. Sure, we have to connect all generations with the living God. And a part of that is to help all people live lives as disciples. We need to impress upon all generations that the only lasting good any of us can do is to leave a legacy with others. We simply must be secure enough with ourselves and our calling to ministry that we desire to help others discover who they have been created to be. Each person is unique,and each person deserves to be allowed to express their unique-ness for the good of the body. Don't ask for a hand before you give them your heart. The way we show we care is by taking serious their questions, and being willing to look around and see what God is doing in their world for "Heaven's sake." Don't patronize young people by setting up church "systems" that make a place for them in the future. Older generations would be wise to help them find their place now. Wisdom is critical, but if we simply expect them to follow our rules without helping them to find significance then we are setting them up to fail. Just one mid-thirties Pastor's opinion.

Warning: sarcasm ahead.

Our church had a great guilt-studded sermon about how Christians are supposed to ACT on their faith. Now, I have nothing wrong with proving your faith with action, and we can get into that sticky debate later, but when the good ol' southern altar call came, people were encouraged to "go to the wall" and sign up to be more active in church programming. IN church. Teach Sunday school, help out in the nursery, mow the lawn, join the praise band... Funny how preaching was left out. Nothing about how to be more active with your faith outside the Christian ghetto--er, faith community, stepping out, being bold... And still a great mindset of US vs. THEM. (This mindset needs to go away. Quickly.)

I have grown up in church my whole life. I was in my 20s when I began questioning the fundamentalism of my home church including their antiquated role of women in the church, which for some reason didn't spill out into the "marketplace," and why-oh-why does God only work on international missions trips? I began my own search within Christianity and studying and talking with those of other faiths. And no, it wasn't at college when my great spiritual awakening happened. It was working at a Christian bookstore, where I received the most abuse I never expected from fellow "brothers and sisters" in Christ. I arrived at the mindset that we need to stop waiting for people to come to us to ask the questions. We need to follow Christ's example and Go Into The World. Be the Salt and the Light. Accept that we don't have all the answers and God can't be summed up into three main points, six subsections, and snazzed up with Flash or animated PowerPoint. There's a lot in the Bible that isn't talked about, and that's okay. And I love the list from the seminarian. Rock on.

And yes, the older generation's responsibility is to mentor the younger generation on WHY this is a lifechanging decision. If there is no Why, there is no vision and without vision, the people will perish.

This is how you reach the "younger" generation, though my generation of 30-somethings have been out of institutional religion for nearly a decade, unless we had kids. You need to live it unashamedly and get out of your busy Christian schedule and help someone inside OR outside "the church". Be Church -- capital C.

I have a sneaking suspicion that the issue is that of discipleship. Are we as parents DISCIPLING our children? It isn't enough to take your child to church and see that they are safely in Sunday school. It is not the (youth or otherwise) pastor's job, the "church's" job, or the SS teacher's job to raise your child. It is your responsiblity. And as any parent will tell you - It is a LOT of work. Discussion after discussion after discussion. Very focussed and intentional.
Our teenager has stated that our relationship is "weird" among her (Christian) friends....her friends do not talk about relationships, sex, walking out a Christian life and how to handle situations with their parents....I don't have a 20+ something child so I can't say for sure that it works - our daughters early and mid teenagers so far...so good.
I grew up with no training and determined it would not be the same for my children....

I see young people leaving the church and it bothers me, too! Maybe we should go where the young people are (Taco Bell) or have church in a different setting. I am not sure about seniors teaching youth - they relate better to someone closer to their age.I like the idea of discussing what you believe with the young age group as they need to know how the truths in the Bible can be real in their lives. Our church does that with the adults, and our youth leader is good about challenging the youth.

Whenever I am asked to do anything much at church, I invite my kids to help me. Without them, I couldn't have done nearly as much, as well. The young adults and teens living in my home set up chairs, clean, work in the sound booth with an adult mentor, help with art, graphics, worship slides, pray with grown ups, and help lead a small group. My kids have caused our small group to thrive by involving their friends from school and work. I suggest we don't treat teens and young adults like irresponsible silly children. We can instead, allow them to show us their brilliance, strength and courage by encouraging them to use their gifts, talents and passion to build the church. Let's let them know we need them by asking for their help while they are young.

My understanding of much of what has gone before is an answer to the what and how questions. There as the previous post points is a greater question. Who?
If we are the body are we really alive or are we as some have criticized silos. It is my understanding that the work of mission has the power to glue the truth and un-glue the lies from groups of people. I have seen many who, after stepping out of their small world of self need and actualization, to demonstrate with a short time of their life that there is something else more important, find themselves identifying, and with some encouragement living with the body of believers in a real and vital way. Missions is not the answer but may, in many situations be a vehicle towards the goal of a real body life.

Can we really be whole individually? No. Do we need each other? Of course, the circumstances that allow us as individuals to grasp this deeply enough to change us into communal beings, must be orchestrated by those who lead us. It is, as others have said, on the basis of relationship that we can connect with others both within and outside the “church” not programs. It is up to the vast majority of us to follow into community, learning to love unconditionally those around us. Which is not only missional but very much Church. We as Christians have Him in us to give. Do we really need a how to, when it is more about who?

I am not sure of the answer, but I'm not sure the answer is to collect data and think about it some more, which is McLaren’s answer to just about everything. Kids, just like most people, want significant people in their lives to love, care and listen. What a concept. No need to collect data and think about that. No need to hold off for a season, just do it.

I think, in general, we do not expect enough of our young adults. The church has ministered to them as children and teenagers, but not encouraged them to be ministers and servants in return. Young adults are waiting longer to get married, living with their parents longer, spending money on their wants while parents continue to provide for their needs. We need to treat young adults as equals, not encourage them to remain dependent on us. We must teach them how to tithe and give sacrificially, and to find a place of service. For too long the church has fretted over how to keep people entertained and on an emotional high. If this continues, the local church is doomed; our young adults will not have learned that church is not about them, but about learning to live out their lives as a sacrifice of praise to the very One who created them.

As several have pointed out, parents are responsible to disciple their children. However, does the church train, or even encourage, parents to train and connect with their kids, or simply to deposit them in and then help work the "mega program"? Program fodder does not make disciples. Discipleship is a much more personal process, and church (at least here) is an increasingly impersonal place.

Pep rally Christianity crumbles under pressure every time. Life isn't all smiles and emotional upbeats, though two Sundays ago a woman in our class derided those who come to church without gleeful facial expressions. It's no wonder that young adults dismiss church when the hard knocks come (and they do come), and the pep rally "faith" just doesn't deliver the stamina to endure. Then come the hard questions, and patent answers that do not suffice. Stamina and the depth to engage such questions could have been achieved through Biblical discipleship, but if they were raised by parents too busy to escort them personally through that process, one can project how they will raise their own children, and yet another generation may find itself driven to a preferable infidelity.

It has always been a paramount responsibility of the Church to make the Gospel and Doctrine relevant to the hearer. Does that mean though that we reduce or remove any element that is not understood or accepted. Let's not avoid the questions but answer them according to historical biblical truth, not just in a generationally relative manner. Our younger Christians need understanding as well as EDUCATION, as we all do.

This article raises some important questions.

My thoughts are the following:
(I am not too bold to call them answers.)

I have come to believe it's about presence.

The presence of God in your life.

The presence of you in thier life.

Recently Professor Joe Culumber of Greenville College influenced me with the following:

We need to embrace an Emmaus road jouirney of spritual development more than a Demascus road journey. Both were approaches by Christ to individuals he loved and cared about. One was confrontational, the other time consuming and relational. In a post-modern world, the Emmaus road approach will be more welcomed.

My experience with 20-somethings agrees.

Yea, I see lots of people leaving the church these days - most who are not leaving God - they're trying to find Him! I see a lot of people finding Him too - but not in traditional churches. They're finding authentic Chrisitanity in homes, at the coffee shops, and lots of new churches that are really open to people at all stages of looking, growing, and exploring a wonderful relationship with an awesome God who really cares about how we feel and think and live. The church isn't dead people - its just morphing into the next generation of expression. Personally, I'm really excited about whats going on - even if it means the death of some tried and true, but tired and blue institutionalized churches.

The original question of what the church hasn't done has been dramatically answered...frightening, yet no doubt true. How can this conversation move to potential helpful answers for what the church can and should be doing to be ministry to those inside and outside thier walls?

I've been in church since my mom was pregnant with me. Why did I stay? As an early teen, the pastor listened to my off the wall question and changed church practice as a result. As an older teen, I was given a job to do, and then another, with deacon blessing. My only time of wavering is now, in a church that has all the answers and doesn't want to hear mine.

How do Mormons get their kids to give up 2 years in the prime of their life to wear drab clothing and ride bicycles around town? They treat them like they are valued members of the faith community and give them important jobs to do. My church tries to keep the kids entertained and out of the way.

You want to reach the next generation? Give them what all the rest of us want - to be valued, to be listened to, to be given important tasks with meaningful results that match our gifts, skills and abilities.

Mike

I believe that we do a disservice to teenagers by institutionalizing them into the Church world. We teach them the right arguments to answer an atheist, or Muslim, but often don't encourage them to have a real vibrant relationship with Jesus. Is it more important to win the argument, or to love someone as Christ loves us.
Too often, we mistake busyness in church, or even church attendance for a relationship with Christ.
In answer to the first post, I believe that one reason that many missionary kids go back is that their parents often communicated the calling they felt to their kids and how important it was for the whole family to go and be a beacon of light to those who had no hope. The MK's I know saw their parents with a passion and fire to serve God. They saw mom and dad following God obediently to places most of us wouldn't think or desire to go to.

And why does God only work on International Missions trips? We just took a group of teens to Mexico and saw God work in amazing ways. The challenge is to keep them asking God to use them and remain in conversation with Him. Maybe we are encouraged to do things on these trips that we are supposed to do, but get too busy when we come home?

Mike's point is well made. It's a great example of new questions shifting the approach to a particular topic.

Young adults are shifting the conversation from passive attendance (which is easier for churches to measure) to participating (which is harder not only to measure, but do as it involves leaders reliquishing some control).