Her.meneutics: Confession: I Stopped Giving to the Church

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January 8, 2010

Confession: I Stopped Giving to the Church

There's something psychologically important about writing a check and putting it in the plate.

Sarah Pulliam Bailey

I stopped tithing a few months ago. Okay, no scandal here. I got married in September, and my husband and I moved to a new area and wanted to find a church. As we slowly combined our finances, it became painful. (He’s a cheapskate, and I didn’t want him to see every pair of earrings I splurged on.)

Within a few months we found a church that we really liked for various reasons. As the new year approached, we resolved to streamline our finances. Eager to get in our giving before 2009 ended for tax purposes, we talked about back-tithing. We decided to tithe the four months we had been married, which felt like a lot of money. It was daunting to put the check in the offering plate and watch the money pulled from our bank account. I then vowed to talk with someone about having our tithing automatically deducted from our account so we wouldn’t think twice about it.

On one hand, you could argue, “It’s not your money to begin with, so pretend like you never had it.” On the other hand, there’s something psychological about physically writing a check and putting it in the brass plate. If we all paid our taxes once a year instead of having them automatically deducted from our paychecks each pay period, we would probably feel the pinch much more. I often wonder whether I should stop the deduction so I could invest the money during the year and then pay up later. (But that, of course, requires some self-control.)

The authors of Freakonomics, economist Steven Levitt and journalist Stephen J. Dubner, report that economist Milton Friedman came up with automatic tax withholding from employees’ paychecks. Americans weren’t paying their income taxes, as I would imagine it’s hard to remember to save up a huge chunk every year. Levitt and Dubner also write a lot about the importance of incentives: We need a really good reason to eat our vegetables (think Vitamin C) and to resist the temptation to speed (think a $100 ticket).

In college, I was amazed at the lengths to which ministry groups would go for fundraisers. Sure, I’ll give $20 to a ministry for the Dalits if it comes with a free dinner. But doesn’t that eat up a lot of the money that would have gone to the people we’re helping? After the Southeast Asia tsunami in December 2004, we were allowed to forgo our cafeteria meal so we could fast and give. That’s called killing two birds with one stone, my friends.

Mixing up spiritual disciplines aside, why do we feel like we must get the most bang for our buck? Why do we tend to only give if we get something in return? When was the last time we gave just to give? Eric Felten writes in The Wall Street Journal today about the quandary that stores put people in when they ask customers who are checking out to give a few bucks to local charities:

[P]utting the touch on people in semi-captive situations such as the grocery-store checkout line isn't necessarily a good thing for charity. Perhaps I'm wrong, and quotidian solicitations will make us more mindful of the plight of others and more open to helping the sick and the needy. But I suspect that the growing number of stores asking customers to chip in may end up creating a backlash. There was a time when telephone solicitations for charity worked — and so they proliferated. But after a while, people became ever more practiced at saying no.

Going back to tithing, I think there’s something to be said for physically putting in that check, even though it’s probably more convenient to have it electronically deducted. In some ways, writing that check solidified my commitment to the church. People like Douglas LeBlanc have done a lot of thinking in this area. His book Tithing: Test Me in This comes out next month. Here’s an excerpt:

For [John and Sylvia] Ronsvalle [founders of financial ministry empty tomb, inc.], tithing is not only a matter of obeying God. It is also a conscious way to resist the self-worship that accompanies greed and stinginess. In one essay they have published online, the Ronsvalles quote a fellow Christian as asking them, "If I'm not trusting God with my money, am I really trusting him with my eternal salvation?"

Perhaps it’s time to reexamine our incentives, whether it’s in tithing or giving just to give.

Comments

I just think you all have the idea of tithing all wrong. It makes me sad.

Hi muse,
Thanks for weighing in. Can you explain more about the idea of tithing? Where do you think I went wrong and what would you recommend?

I have always been really thankful for parents who taught me to tithe my money from grandma before I had anything not provided for me. Giving was a joy. It still is. I loved this post and I think you are right on Sarah.

I have attended two churches now where people in leadership did not feel they had to tithe. They have both died despite a lot of other really wonderful things. I thought the LeBlanc book quote was an apt way of looking at it and the best explanation for these two churches that starved to death.

The tithing thing and giving to charity in general has been super tough for me recently. I am not earning anything... so the tithing money (rather than time and such) isn't such a big deal. However, I sometimes feel guilty in Church when I don't give anything, which is silly since my Church really doesn't focus on that.

The charity thing in stores really, really, REALLY bugs me though. I hate going to a store and having them ask, "Can you spare $2.00 for school supplies for a low-income child?" when I have just scraped enough change from around the house to buy school supplies myself, at the expense of possibly eating. Yet, I feel like a scrooge if I don't give it, because I don't "look" poor.

I must have some guilt complex going on lol!

Thank you both for weighing in and sharing your experiences. Sara, I think guilt is natural, though sometimes unwarranted, especially if you are trying to make ends meet.

We Tithed for about 9 months after we were married. Our church then went through some upheavals, including a few pastoral changes in short order. Each new pastor had a different project for the church to accomplish. New upholstery for the pews, remodeled sanctuary and fellowship space--currently we are trying to fund a new parking lot. I became disillusioned with our leadership and it's use of resources. I realized my home needed upholstery, remodeling, and a new parking lot. I became astounded at the portion of the Church's budget that is used just to maintain a building that is used, for the most part, once a week. Even more astounding is the Church's ability to convince its congregations to just keep on giving (witness Saddleback's recent windfall.) Needless to say, I have stopped tithing long ago and would like my 5 thousand dollars back!

In this article does "tithing" mean "giving", or are you using it in the Biblical sense of "giving one-tenth"? Are you saying that you don't give at all, or that you have reduced your giving from what you gave before you married? Thank you for the clarification.

Our church gives small tags on card stock to each of our members/families who give electronically. That gives them an opportunity to show that they give, reminds them of their commitment and often causes other people to ask them about giving that way.

We don't tithe. We make a regular donation to a project of our choice, one that is close to our hearts and that we believe in. We also give to other areas/projects as we are able to and as we feel led. This is not necessarily always monetary, it could be in time or in goods.

I'm not sure that mandatory tithing is right. If Jesus fulfilled the Old Covenant, is tithing now obsolete?

Did tithing in the Old Testament always relate to money anyway? Or did it have something to do with making sure the widows, fatherless etc had clothes, food, provisions? Should the church be focused on that more than upgrading their furniture? I definitely think so.

Perhaps monetary tithing is something that's been taught for years and keeps on being taught just because it's always been that way.

Genesis 31. There you find God saying "vow" which is "of all you give me (land) I will give you a tenth." Afterwards the wives of Jacob agree to leave the one taking money from them. That was Laban, their father. Augustine says that these wives of Jacob represent the New Testament. So.........It is a New Testament value to leave those who wrongfully extort money (Isaiah 33:15) from you. When God says 'tithe', it gives boldness to them who are having money taken from them. Laban considered it an injustice to himself that they and their money would leave.

This post makes me sad also. In the OT tithes were meant to glorify God, and also to support the church and the priests who worked full-time to minister to the people. How else would they be able to eat and be clothed? In our current churches tithes are also still to give back to God, but practically -- to support the church and the pastor(s) who work full time to support and encourage and guide its members. Electric bills need to be paid. Heat needs to be on in the winter. Mortgage or rent needs to be paid. And our pastors are expected to work full time so that we have spiritual guides. Our praise band is talented and performs God's songs every Sunday. Well, something had to pay for the lights, instruments, and microphones. Our Sunday school and nursery ministers to the children every Sunday. Something has to be available for materials and supplies. Tithing is our expression of gratefulness, our encouragement to our pastors, and our willingness to give away what doesn't really matter anyway. 10%??? That's a miniscule amount...yes, there have been times of financial pain...but a giving heart is the sign of a mature Christian.

Say Sara:
Whats wrong with Muse?
She is the one who has it wrong.

Second: I don't get it. Please tell me Why. Here it is: Is it Meneutics OR is it menuetics?
See what I mean.
Harry. Also known as "omeomy".

KP, I completely agree with you. Tithing has been taught a certain way for so many years that people now think it is biblical, and it's just not - at least the way it's presented here and in so many financial, pseudo-christian programs that are rampant in our churches. It makes me sad that people swallow this propaganda and believe everything they see or hear without examining it for themselves. The important thing to remember when you're talking about God and possessions is that EVERYTHING you have is a gift from God, and, in turn, belongs to Him. What we do with that gift is between us and God. I do wish that people who write for hermeneutics took more of a biblical approach.

I gotta go with Muse here, at least to some extent. There isn't a single mention of tithing for a believer in the New Testament, not a single one.... The closest thing the NT gets to teaching about financial giving is in the book of Acts and that is more about being honest about what you give. And in the epistles to the Corinthians and that is more about relief support. Paul does teach us to pay pastors, and Jesus teaches us to give to God, but neither teaches how much or how to do it. So how should we do it? I don't know, I use tithing as a model, simply because that is the closest thing believers have to go on, but I'm not dogmatic, partly because the system in which tithing was commanded no longer exists. The Levitical system is gone, but Pastors and church staff are somewhat similar, so it's a place to start.

I also have to go with Muse. In addition, Paul earned a living as a a tent maker. No where in the NT does Paul or anyone else instruct us to build seminaries and turn out professional theologians who believe it is their right to assume the role of pastor in a church or start their own church. They have an entitlement mentality which includes receiving a tithe.

Hey DFB,
What about Matthew 23:23? Jesus says the Pharisees should continue their tithing but not forget to engage their hearts for the unfortunate. You say, "well he was reflecting practices before the cross." The Gospel of Matthew was written in the 50s. Long into the churches growth and development. That message was for his church and ours today as well. American Christians are some of the least generous proportionally in the world. 10% would a good "starting" point for most of us.

Show me someone who complains about tithing, I show you someone disengaged from their own amazing blessings and God's call for us to be givers. 10%? We should try it first before we complain about it. Show me a tither and I'll show you someone who is blessed and wants to give more. I can't believe we are complaining about a challenge to give more?

Bruce, non-tithers are not non-givers. We don't believe the idea of tithing is correctly or biblically expressed. Why stop at 10%? Why not 25%? Tithing gives people that idea that if they're giving 10% they're meeting some kind of biblical criteria - they've complied with the rule - but they couldn't be more wrong. People who complain about the use of the word tithing as a standard ARE PROBABLY GIVING WELL ABOVE A TITHE. My position has always been - it's not about how much you give, it's about how much you have left over. Someone who gives a measly 10% and still lays around on his (or her) yacht is not practicing biblical giving. Jesus was more impressed by the widow's mite than he was with the "big" givers. Why? Because she gave all she had. That is the point that I wish to make - EVERYTHING we have belongs to God.

The New Testament does not teach tithing, which was part of the Mosiac Law. Because Jesus redeemed us from the curse of the law through His blood shed on the cross, Christians are not required to tithe. Instead, we are to give what we have decided in our hearts to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver (2 Cor. 9:7-8). Too many churches promote the heresy that we are still under the law when it comes to tithing, all the while forgetting that "all who rely on observance of the law are under a curse" (Galatians 3:10). Under the Old Covenant, God's people were blessed if they observed the law; under the New Covenant, we are blessed because of what Jesus did on the cross, not because of anything we do. Tithing is all about performance. Furthermore, the concept of tithing isn't even applied consistently in today's churches. For instance, in the Old Testament there were three tithes, yet that is never mentioned during sermons on tithing (at least at the churches I have attended). In addition, the OT tithe was on the "increase" of livestock or produce, meaning you would have to have some kind of a profit in order to be obligated to tithe. It is sad that so many Christians prefer to be in bondage to the law rather than enjoy the freedom we have in Christ.

The New Testament may not speak directly to tithing...but Christ did talk about our finances...and in a very direct way. Jesus addressed money.... alot. And He said...give it all away to the rich young ruler. Why? Because money is very easily a god in our culture.

I think churches have a bad track record with tithing and giving money but that doesn't change the fact that we are called to give...give it all to God's work. God is working in my life...and He has given me the resources to fund my life. He has also challenged me to give...even when it hurts and is sacrificial to the needs of my local congregation.

We can dance around this all we want...but in the end, it is just plain giving excuses. The issue isn't whether we give...it is why don't we give more?

And for the record...I was a person who didn't tithe and I had quite the repertoire of reasons for not doing it...and they sounded logical and appropriate. Why didn't I tithe...for real? Because I was greedy and wanted it all for myself. I find the loudest voices are often the ones fighting the conviction of the Holy Spirit. Just being honest about my own battle with this issue.

I think a fundamental mistake is made and its because we use words rather carelessly. Tithes are PAID - not "given" - if we are going to stick by the principle in scripture. Under the covenant of GRACE we are to GIVE generously and Christians need to to pay more attention to what the bible actually teaches instead of believing everthing that comes from the mouth of men. While I agree 10% is a place to start (in GIVING of one's substance) it can never be seen as replacing or empowering the OT tithe system.

When you give a tenth of your income to your local church, don’t insult God by calling your gift The Lord’s Tithe.

God defined His tithe in Leviticus 27:30-33. The Lord’s tithe is defined as a tenth of crops and animals which are miracles of God. God NEVER commanded or requested anyone to give to Him a tenth of what man makes or earns. God said His tithe was Holy. Why was it Holy? Because it came from God.

The tithe was to GIVE BACK to God a tenth of what came from God’s hand, not man’s hand. You can’t “give back” to God something that you, yourself, earned.

In Numbers 18 God commanded that His tithe be taken to The Levites forever. If you don’t take The Lord’s Tithe to the Levites, you have rebelled against God by being disobedient to His command.

At no time did God, in His Word, give the Christian church permission to receive His tithe. You don’t have permission to take His tithe to a church, and your pastor does not have permission to receive His tithe.

At no time did Jesus say that giving to the church was giving to Him. Jesus did say that when you give to the needy, you are giving to Him. (Matthew 25:42-45)

In 1 Timothy 5:8 God tells us that we should take care of our family first. We learn from this verse that if we give to the church first, and then don’t have enough left to take care of our family, we are worse than an unbeliever.

The New Testament Church is to be financed by free-will gifts, not tithing. Tithing was the way God provided for financing the Levitical priesthood. In Hebrews 7:5,12,18 we learn that the command that established the Levitical priesthood (Numbers 18), which included tithing, was disannulled. To say otherwise would mean we are still under the Levitical priesthood.

In Malachi 3:5 God tells the priests that he will judge those who defraud the worker of his wages. Pastors who teach that tithing is required today, or that the Bible teaches that ten persent is the starting point for giving, are defrauding the worker of his wages.

Don’t fall for this false teaching. Study The Word for yourself. Before you ever again give to your church AND CALL IT TITHING, please find the scriptures that support:
1 – tithing on your income
2 – taking God’s tithe to your local church
3 – tithing in the New Testament Church

Remember, the New Testament Church doesn’t begin until after Calvary; therefore, Matthew 23:23 is still referring to the Old Testament Law.

I challenge any tither to show me scripture to support tithing today. Read my book (it's free) and learn what the Bible really says about tithing. www.TithingBook.info

Tithing in the new covenant is a travisty. The old covenant
was for the state of Israel only and if you owned land and farmed and raised animals you were to give 1/10 of what was produced.The levites collected the tithe and one tenth of tithe went to the priests. The new covenant church wants the whole tenth instead of what the old covenant states. The levites could not inherit or own land, however if the preachers are teaching per the old covenant they will
only take one tenth of the tenth and not own land. Only farmers and herdsmen tithed, none of the trades tithed, carpenters did not tithe, tent makers did not tithe, fishermen did not tithe, and so one. The new covenant teaches free will giving under grace, not ten percent as the
old covenant teaches. Why does the new covenant church teach this heresy, and attempt to put the yoke of the old covenant on new covenant christian, it is extortion, a lie
and when Jesus was crucified the yoke of bondage was lifted.
All christians are priests and there are no more levites, priests, or temple so who would we tithe to. Read the book of Hebrews for all the answers and do not listen to the preachers because they are the selfish ones

@richard

"God defined His tithe in Leviticus 27:30-33. The Lord’s tithe is defined as a tenth of crops and animals which are miracles of God. God NEVER commanded or requested anyone to give to Him a tenth of what man makes or earns. God said His tithe was Holy. Why was it Holy? Because it came from God."

This perspective assumes that "what we make/earn does not come from God". But is such a view biblical? Is not all creation (including what we make/earn) subjected to the sovereignty of God?

The crops & animals may be miracles of God, but are they not tended by shepards and farmers? Manpower and human labour had went into the final product.

The issue of tithing is moot, but we ought to start giving from the point of grace. By God's grace I was "fearfully and wonderfully made", endowed with talents to innovate, create and produce various goods & services. By God's grace I was given the appropriate opportunities and resources to work and serve in various positions and roles.

Therefore every of my "creation" (or productivity) can be attributed to the good work the Lord had began in me since my point of conception.

I will not withhold anything from Him, and ready myself to give at all times (with good counsel and wisdom of the Word, the Spirit and the people around me).

However I still do struggle in my giving, but I recognize it's a heart issue. Swinging between semantics and Old/New Covenants is essential, but it scarcely address the root issue.

The heart of the issue is our hearts.

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