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Her.meneutics is edited by associate editor Katelyn Beaty and online editor Sarah Pulliam Bailey.

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May 13, 2011

Food Cleanses and the Integrated Self

How nourishment illuminates the relationship between the body and other aspects of our humanity.

Amy Julia Becker

We live in a culture obsessed with food. Eating disorders, once the exclusive terrain of adolescent girls, plague populations as diverse as older adults, Orthodox Jewish women, and young men. On the other hand, the nation as a whole is experiencing an “obesity epidemic.” Whether through self-starvation or self-indulgence, many Americans have an unhealthy relationship with food.

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When I was 14 years old, I was diagnosed with a condition called gastro paresis, paralysis of the stomach. The doctors couldn’t determine a cause and they didn’t know of a cure. In retrospect, I think I had been eating so little that my body slowed to a halt in response. Soon enough, I couldn’t keep any food in my system. It came right back up. I told myself, and others, that I was suffering from a rare illness. The thing was, I liked being sick. Or at least, I liked being able to eat whatever I wanted without any worry about weight gain.

In the midst of those years of doctors’ appointments and visits to therapists and hospitalizations and continuing to insist to everyone around me that I was “doing just fine,” I remember my aunt asking, “What is there in your life that you need to purge?”

It took me years to understand her question. My aunt knew that I had more than a physical problem. She recognized that mind, body, and spirit exist within an integrated whole. And until I was willing to see the same, I wasn’t able to heal. In the end, recovery took an integrated approach. I needed prayer. I needed physical therapy to get my organs moving again. I needed medication for a time. And I needed to address the perfectionist tendencies (aka idolatries) that caused me to fear gaining weight and to want to appear thin and beautiful to the outside world.

As a result of my difficult history with food, I still avoid magazines about “health and fitness” because the images and tips inside could send me back into self-destructive patterns of thinking. I’ve noted but tried to ignore the Atkins diet, the Zone, the Mediterranean, and the like. But when two of my friends talked about the “cleanses” they were doing of late, I was interested.

These “cleansing diets” caught my attention because, according to my friends, the purpose wasn’t weight loss. Rather, it was changing patterns of eating and drinking in order to rid the body of toxins. No alcohol. No caffeine. Real food, albeit incredibly healthy unprocessed food. But in addition to the physical benefits, my friends told me that cleansing their bodies of toxins would lead to greater mental clarity and well-being. Although it wasn’t explicitly Christian, it sounded like an approach to eating that understood the relationship between the body and other aspects of our humanity.

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Paul’s theology of the body demonstrates an understanding of the self as an integrated whole. He describes ways that our physical actions and choices necessarily influence the spiritual, emotional, and relational aspects of our being. In a discussion of the impact of the physical act of sex upon our spiritual lives, he reminds us that our bodies are “temples” of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 6:19). Bodily acts cannot be divorced from spiritual consequences. In Romans 14, Paul takes up the question of eating food sacrificed to idols, and although he gives permission to eat any food, he does so with the understanding that what we eat impacts how we relate to God and to our community.

In America, we have plenty of food and yet that plenty has often led to the twin problems of deprivation and overeating. Jesus delights in the richness of a feast on occasion (Matthew 11:19) and at times he practices fasting as a means of communion with God (Luke 4:2). He models an approach to food that recognizes the body as more than physical. The one who is the bread of life also taught us to ask God for our daily bread.

I still haven’t tried an official cleanse. I’d rather eat every day with the recognition that what I put into my body has an impact on my thoughts, my emotions, even my prayers. That what I eat makes a difference in my relationships with others and with God. (The issue of food justice, which is to say, how our food purchases impact individual workers and animals and so forth, is a topic for another day. See “A Feast Fit for a King” for more.)

As I try to return to the size I was before getting pregnant with our third child, I remind myself that the goal isn’t appearing good to others or achieving some ideal of a “perfect” body. The goal isn’t exclusively, or even primarily, about myself. The goal is to honor God with my body and to remember God’s intentions for this body of mine.

As I sit at a computer, as I play ball with our kids, as I nurse our daughter, as I delight in a walk with a friend on a spring day, my body is a temple of the Spirit, fed by God’s goodness and by God’s physical provision. Food is not a way to serve myself, but a way to nourish my body for God’s glory and the blessing of those around me.

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Posted by Sarah Pulliam Bailey on May 13, 2011 10:54 AM

Comments

Amy, Good article. Very true. The part you wrote toward the end about the point is that we are supposed to honor God with our bodies is one we all need to hear. It isn't about the latest trends, the latest fashions. I remember going on my first diet when I was 9 years old. I wasn't a chubby child. I've never been chubby, but I began dieting at that age and wasn't rid of it until my early 20s. God delivered me from the weight obsession. Food issues, diet issues, weight issues, shouldn't fill our minds. Jesus is to fill our minds. Whatever we think about, obsess over, that "thing" has control over us.

I remember what it felt like to be free from the concern of weight and what not to eat. Oh, freedom! And then, for a short time I fell back into that because of a bad relationship I got in. I allowed the man I was dating to manipulate me and I felt insecure and again began obsessing about weight, diet, appearance, etc. But God was (and is) faithful. He showed me this. Once I saw it for what it was again I embraced the freedom only God can give.

Congratulations on your daughter!

Posted By: Jane Hinrichs | May 13, 2011 11:47 AM

I have wondered about those food cleanses as well, but my perfectionist tendencies have forced me to maintain balance and not go "overboard" one way or another. I try to eat good, healthy food, but don't berate myself if I eat a donut or bowl of ice cream. Food is to be enjoyed, in moderation, and my heart goes out to those who have struggled with it in the past, and still struggle with it now.

Posted By: Kalyn | May 13, 2011 11:58 AM

Thank you for writing this. I am in remission of my eating disorder (of 10 years) and feeling quite triggered again. It is hard for me to do God's will when this disease is taking hold inside of me again, but your post inspired me to try harder. :)

Posted By: Samantha | May 13, 2011 2:45 PM

This is definitely a topic that needs to be discussed more frequently, especially among Christian women. I, too, have had to be careful about what sorts of images I will allow myself to see via magazines, and have tried to stay away from "dieting" as it tends to bring up "perfectionist idolatries," as you've called them.

A word on cleansings: from a medical standpoint, they are really worthless, so tread carefully. http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/colon-cleansing/AN00065

I think that they could do some good if the goal is to eat healthier or fast. But if you think you're getting rid of toxins or want a quick-start to weight loss, it isn't recommended. Also, take it from someone who HAS done different kinds of cleanses before: as a person recovering from an eating disorder, it opens a door better left shut.

Posted By: even one sparrow | May 13, 2011 5:06 PM

In my opinion this was a great article. Over 15 years ago I was attending Overeateres Anonymous and having difficulty when a woman asked me, Donna, "What is it going to take?" She meant what would it take for me to hit bottom and get with the program. Over 15 years later, a diabetes diagnosis, two heart attacks and a stroke later, I still carry around 85 pounds of excess weight. As a Christian I found this article to be one of the most hopeful I have read and wish there more like them. I still don't know what it will take, but I do know the elements of the spiritual and physical will be both be part of my food redemption when it comes. I continue to read the bible, and pray about it daily and do believe there is recovery for me should the Lord tarry. Again thanks for such a hopeful presentation and I hope more articles like this appear in the future.

Posted By: Donna Millard | May 14, 2011 10:42 AM

I really appreciated when you wrote, "I’d rather eat every day with the recognition that what I put into my body has an impact on my thoughts, my emotions, even my prayers."

I'm thinking that care-filled eating, paying attention to our bodies and understanding why we eat what we eat when we eat it is the key to any long-term healthy food plan. That ugly word "diet" has gotta go!

This life is a marathon, not a sprint. The way I care for my body should reflect that philosophy. No short term cleanses, diets, or exercise marathons for me!

Posted By: Linda Stoll | May 15, 2011 3:48 PM

Bravo, Amy...you bring clarity and compassion to a topic that we must talk about more. It's not about polarizing this conversation into "good" and "bad"...it's about embracing the reality that everything is spiritual, including the way we treat our bodies.

Posted By: Nicole | May 16, 2011 8:31 AM

Oh, if only, if only, if only. I really believe that my addiction to sweets is connected in some way to my feelings about myself and others. I pray daily for the strength to say no to high sugar items and stay on the Weight Watcher's program that once helped me, but I slip so easily. The connection to caring for our bodies as God's temple is a good focus for me. Thanks.

Posted By: Gail | May 16, 2011 2:19 PM

Amy,

I love your humble approach to this topic - such a controversial one, and you handle it with grace.

My only concern - Paul's message in Romans 14 is one that says the MATURE believer is freer to eat food sacrificed to idols; it is the weaker believer that struggles with the food issue. To emulate this is not necessarily right.

Romans 14 is saying: if God has laid it specifically on YOUR heart to eat or practice some non-biblical issue, it is a matter of conscience between you and God. Also, it is not right to press that matter of conscience onto any other believer.

I only share this because Romans 14 has freed me in so many controversial issues that do not have clear biblical commands - the education of our children (public vs. private vs. homeschooling), hospital birth versus homebirth, breastfeeding versus formula, and many, many food issues.

This freedom in Christ doesn't mean I don't have personal convictions; just that they can be just that - personal.

I'd love to hear your take on this end-of-the-day and perhaps unclear comment.

Resting in Christ,
Karen

Posted By: Karen | May 16, 2011 9:53 PM

Karen, I think you and I agree. My only point in referencing Romans 14 is that Paul demonstrates a connection between the choices we make about food (and about how we treat our bodies more generally) and our spiritual lives. Does that help to clarify?

Amy Julia

Posted By: Amy Julia Becker | May 18, 2011 10:57 AM

Ahhh! I get it! Sorry I didn't see it so clearly the first time through. Thanks for clarifying. I DO see that every thing in my life is about God simply because every moment of my life is to be a Spirit-filled moment, which would of course include the moments when I am eating. So glad that he will meet us where we are individually and grant us grace and direction in this area, as in all other areas we present to Him.

Many thanks,
Karen

Posted By: Karen | May 19, 2011 2:01 PM

@Amy:

Wow. Just wow. I wish there was a way to get in touch with you. I'm linking my name to my email, and I can only hope that you'll be kind enough to write to me. I've suffered from post-viral gastroparesis for almost two years now. I've been led to believe that most people do NOT recover. The fact that you DID recover...Well, obviously I'd love to find out about your steps to recovery, particularly this physical therapy you're talking about. I've never heard of physical therapy as a treatment for gastroparesis.

All that said, I want to address a few of your points because I worry that readers might come away from this blog with some misconceptions about gastroparesis (GP). Today we know quite a bit about GP. We know that it results from damage to the vagus nerve, which controls the digestive process in the stomach. We know this damage can be caused by complications of surgery, diabetes, viral illness, and possibly autoimmune conditions. When the doctor doesn't know the cause, it is diagnosed as "ideopathic," but that just means the doctor doesn't know how the vagus nerve was damaged.

GP can strike anyone, but it's much more common in women. However, while it may have been the case that Amy struggled with an eating disorder, otherwise healthy people are diagnosed with GP all the time. I never had any weight problems or eating issues when I was struck with the virus that led to my diagnosis of GP. I've been distressed by the enforced limitations on my diet since I was diagnosed, and I get very anxious anytime I see that I'm losing weight. (I was thin to begin with, so losing too much weight would not be a healthy thing for me.) I can assure you that there is no benefit whatsoever to me in having GP. It has placed terrible restrictions on my life; I have had to organize my entire existence around it. I can also promise you that my GP is not a psychological or spiritual illness; it is a physical illness with a known physical cause. I pray every day for God to heal me, and I have many people praying regularly for me as well. It's not the result of some sin area in my life or a failure of faith.

I'm sorry if any of that sounds harsh, but I just don't want anyone who reads this to think that GP is some psychosomatic illness or something that only affects people with eating disorders. It is a very real, very serious, often permanent physical problem, and it is not a reflection on the psychological or spiritual health of those who suffer with it.

Posted By: GP Girl | May 21, 2011 11:37 PM

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